This is bigger than us.

You saved me.

God save the Queen.

You're a part of me now. You're the only one I could give up my country for.  

England.

You know if I lose you I'll go mad.

I long to tell you the truth. I hope sometimes you run into my lines. You're the only one I've been thinking of for a year.  

Have a happy Christmas.

Lausanne feeling.

The biggest slap I ever got on a gig.

This band is my religion. The only one who can amaze me over and over again with the same songs. 

White Lies, or these shivers that always makes you feel as if it was the first time.

It. Can't. Save. You.

The best live band in my eyes? Oh boy, too hard to pick one. But if we stick to the facts, here's the band who makes me cry the most on gigs:

You'll see the boy you love start burning in the sky.

I wish every single fan could be like Anaïs and Lat. These girls give their love without any smugness. They don't give a fuck about the rest. All they care about is the magic a band can fill up your heart with. They've been the most perfect fellows for that unforgettable gig. Thank you girls, you made my day beautiful.

 

Seriously, I suck at finding good titles.

Nothing better to release the pressure. *headbanging*

Demanding.

I want a boyfriend. I want a part-time boyfriend. I want a boyfriend who lives abroad. I want a boyfriend I would be crazy in love with, but whom I wouldn't get to see too much. I want a boyfriend who barely texts me or call me, but floods me with tenderness everytime we meet. I want to be consumed with lack of him, I want to burst with joy everytime I see him. I don't want a fucking routine. I don't want any commitment. I don't want my heart to beat slower. I only want the best of a relationship.

Howler

Youth. Freshness. Squeezy bananas. Elation. Parties. Sincerity. Gorgeous smiles. Laughter. Michael Jackson. Pants off. Sunshine. Unhooked stars. Good memories. 

Yep, I'm gonna miss these li'l dudes. Come back soon guys. Very soon.

Click here to see the awesome band I'm talking about.

Ian, me and France

12.

I dreamt about my ex-boyfriend last night. Dreamt about his arms, dreamt about his warmth, dreamt about that spark in his eyes. But the thing is, I don't even miss him. I miss LOVE.

Yep yep! Wooh!

I know it's incredibly selfish to say that, but I miss being the only one in the crowd going nuts for a band. When it happens, there's so much connexion with the band. They can only see you. They remember you. Whatever people say, it always feels so good. 

If I were a song?

It's been almost a year. And yet, All In White song still gives me goosebumps. And time always stops when the song starts playing on my iTunes. Thank you The Vaccines.

 

Eargasm.

Now I gotta out tonight.

My belly's so full it hurts. I can feel sugar spreading heavily in my blood.

The Horrors for dummies

How do you approach a member from The Horrors' band? What would be the best thing to tell them? Will I ever dare to talk to them? Here's the questions I kept asking myself, while they kept going pass us, outside of the venue. Only Tom was missing.

We were four girls queueing early at the front doors of Le Bataclan. And none of us felt brave enough to try and communicate with them. These guys sounded so intimidating. We were so afraid of bothering them. Even Rhys, who was smiling in such an endearing way everytime we crossed his eyes. Rhys, our favourite, unanimously. But couldn't manage to tell him not even one single word. 

After two hours, Alicia and I took a deep breath and went to him, fearing to lose our only one chance to talk to him, but our first attempt failed; Rhys apologised, saying he had to get dressed, before running away. I just felt so embarrassed, and was convinced I would never dare to talk to a Horror guy again.

It was before meeting Tom Cowan after the show. 

I had actually never seen him smiling before that very moment. On stage, he always looks so serious, always avoiding eye contact. But off stage, he looks so different. When I spotted him leaving the venue, he was smiling so peacefully at the crowd, that my fear wore off at once. 

And I started chatting with him. He's such a gentleman, quiet and well-mannered. Incredibly sweet and friendly. As a massive fan of him, it was a great moment for me to meet him finally. We got to chat about the show. He told me he really enjoyed that one. And we ended up talking about his little brother's gig in London on that very same night. He even told me his parents were attending to that show. 

That was such a pleasant encounter.

Meanwhile, Rhys was surrounded by fans, accepting all photos, agreeing to sign autographs for anyone asking. Clémence and Mathilde, my new gig buddies, had already got their precious samples from our dear bassist, their hands full with open notebooks and switched on cameras, euphoric. But despite the sudden rush of confidence I got with Tom, I still felt too shy to approach Rhys a second time. However, I really didn't want to leave without getting the chance to talk to him.

"Err... Excuse-me... Rhys?"

He turned back. His face brightened when he recognised me.

"Oh HEY! My favourite audience!"

And then he hugged me. Yes, Rhys Webb hugged me. Not just a hello hug. A big proper hug. As if he was greeting an old friend. WOW. If there were a band, one single band in the world I would never have expected a hug from, it would have been The Horrors... Truly in the top5 of my greatest fangirl moments. 

We got to chat for a bit, and then, like Tom, he signed my setlist, asking my name. 

 "- Laurie.

 - L A U R I E ?, he spelled.

 - ... Yeah...
 - No, tell me!

 - Ok here's the thing; my actual name is Laure, but it turns out it's too complicated for english-speakers to pronounce my name, so my gig name has been Laurie even since Freddie Cowan started to call me like this. It's just easier."

He signed. "Lots of <3 Laurie! Rhys." Couldn't help but check later on the autographs my friends got: he had only signed his name. And I may have been the only fan he hugged. Unbelievable. This was unbelievable. 

Joe and Josh disappeared straight away in the tour bus, but Faris lingered a couple of minutes with the fans. And just so you know, he's not so scary when you treat him as a mere human being! It turns out he's happy to chat with you if you ask him which one was his favourite show on the tour. Budapest, he answered. And Paris was number 2 in his heart, not so bad! 

I was aware of his well-known refusal of photos so I didn't ask him, but he kindly accepted to sign my setlist too. Check out the masterpiece:

Faris' is down on the left

Moral of the story: The Horrors are very surprising boys, so don't get judgemental before meeting them!

Second thoughts.

Just don't give me the Moon, if it's for taking it back later. There is no such thing as stars for rent.

It's just that I hate half-empty-glass stories, you know.

If I
walk away from you
And leave my love
Could I laugh again?

 

"Hey, you're starting to know me pretty well!"

I'm trying so hard to draw your attention by any means, that I keep making a fool of myself. My attempts have been so lame, I'm incapable of showing you the best of me. You must think I'm some kind of weird nympho, who doesn't give a tiny rat's ass about Love. I'm praying for you to see beyond. Even if it wouldn't change anything. I'd rather be rejected for what I really am than loved for what I'm not.

Flèche d'Or.

The Vaccines in Paris, 2010

The Vaccines in Paris, 2011

On next December 17th, it will be a whole year since they came into my life.
And I'm seriously starting to think I've never loved any man as much I love The Vaccines. 

[ and you can see me on both videos, just saying ]

It's a beautiful lie. It's a perfect denial.

Just so you know, I like hiding messages in videos I post.

1.

You're like the stars in the sky; unreachable. I'm rising my hands up in the air, as high as I can, but my arms are too short. I stick to the cold ground, while you spread your light upon the world. I wish I had wings.